When all is said and done, the one who has to live with the resentment, however justified and well-deserved, is the one who feels wronged; and that isn't healthy, no matter what.
Since no forgiveness will be forthcoming from the children - and they are the children, after all - I need to be the more mature side of this equation. For my good as well as theirs - and I care so deeply about their well-being.
So now let's try to see things from their perspective.
They've been exposed to abuse all their lives, whether I was the target or others; they themselves have each been abused by their dad sometime along the way. And yet - he's still and all their dad. They need to love him and see the good in him.
[But why does that have to make me into the villain?]
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