Although my head knows that I am truly not responsible for this sad situation, my heart feels awfully guilty for all the mothering I could have/would have done for them when they were smaller, had I only known better. But honestly - I did the best I could with what few tools the One Above saw fit to provide me with on my journey of motherhood. And the children really did turn out quite OK - upstanding, independent citizens of the world - except for this small detail of estrangement.
So I shouldn't feel guilty - but I do.
I need to add to my self-encouragement relaxation mantra:
"G-d is in charge. He and only He is entirely responsible for all outcomes in life. It is somewhat prideful to feel any differently."
And then to realize and accept that this is their own [poor] choice to behave in this manner - whatever I may or may not have done in the past.
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